My Vegas travel guide

One week ago today, I returned from Las Vegas. Much like my trip last year, this trip was filled with its memorable moments. We spent a great deal more time gambling and less time sight seeing this go around compared to last year. With that in mind, I am not going to give a full recap of the trip. Instead, I will share with you a few of the lessons I learned while in Vegas. Hopefully these will come in handy to you should you ever visit sin city.

I just realized that this post is going to resemble a do's and don't list a la the Travel Channel. Just bear with me. Lol, bears.

DO visit the Minus 5 ice bar in Mandalay Bay. This place was really one of the highlights of the trip. For 35 bucks, they loan you a parka and stick you in this freezer where everything is made out of ice. And when I say everything, I literally mean everything. The tables, chairs, shelves and bar were all made out of ice. Oh, also the cups. The 35 bucks gets you 2 drinks served up to you in tumbler glasses made of ice. When I asked what they do with the cups afterwards, the lady told me with a straight face that they put them in a giant frozen dishwasher. I'm pretty sure she was just joking though...

DON'T get a 100 ounce Long Island Iced Tea at Minus 5. This was probably the worst decision I made on the trip. Failure to heed this warning may result in you being unable to remember leaving Minus 5. It may then also result in you getting kicked out of the Luxor Casino for throwing up all over the casino floor while at the Pai Gow table. I, of course, did not experience that first hand, I just heard it from some random person.

DO throw the remainder of your money on the field at the craps table when you are dwindling on funds. The odds are good that a 2 or 12 will hit and triple your money back up to even. I actually witnessed this twice this trip and it is a guaranteed way to make your money back. Seriously, craps is a hell of a game. Unbelievably fun to play when there is a hot shooter and still only mildly depressing when you run into a cold one.

DON'T play 300 dollars on a single hand of blackjack. This is another one of those "I heard it from some random person" lessons. Just trust me on this one.

DO play the fortune bonus at the Pai Gow table. If you are like me and enjoy Pai Gow poker, quite frankly the only way to win money is to play the fortune bonus. Sure, you might get lucky and win a couple hands to go up a little, but the only sure fire way to win big is to hit the 7 card straight flush with no joker. It pays 30,000 to 1 so on a 5 dollar bet you are talking about $150k. While I was not lucky enough to hit that, I was able to hit 4 of a kind which paid a nice 25 to 1 which netted me a cool $125. Had I been playing the fortune last time in New Orleans, I would have won $750 on my royal flush. I'm never letting an opportunity like that go by again.
DO hit up the champagne brunch at Mandalay Bay. Last year we hit up Planet Hollywoods champagne brunch and were pretty blown away by it. I do have to say, however, that the one at Mandalay Bay edges it out barely in terms of quality and variety of food. You really cant go wrong with unlimited pre-cracked snow crab legs while sipping on mimosas can you?

DON'T go with your gut when it comes to sports betting. I'm convinced that the only way to win at sports betting is to take the same approach that George Costanza took during that episode of Seinfeld: Always do the opposite of what you think is right. Going against your intuition will mean you will take Oakland at +7 over the Chargers and the Bills at +10.5 over the Patriots. I will try this approach next time and let you know how it works out.

Speaking of next time, it appears that I will be headed back to Vegas on or around the 6th of June next year. In the meantime I am pretty burnt out on taking vacations. Traveling all over the place over 5 times this year has taken its toll. And while I wont rule out a quickie trip down to Lake Charles or something, I can safely say that I wont be making any more big trips for a while.

All in all it was a great vacation. Contrary to all of our beliefs, we actually played beer pong in the hotel room and had bacon and eggs in the morning. I would recommend staying at the Jockey Club. We got a great deal and the place even had a little mini-mart in the lobby that was reasonable priced. There was also no silverware was stolen from any restaurants this trip nor were there any bloody noses. I'm already looking forward to the next trip out there....