MLB out to ruin baseball again

Hooray, time for a sports blog! I recently heard some rather disturbing news that Major League Baseball is considering a move to "realign" all teams in the sport. According to the report from "a top official", the 6 divisions would be done away with completely and only the 2 leagues with 16 teams each would remain. The top 8 teams with the best record from each league would then make the playoffs. On paper this makes a lot of sense. In most recent history for instance, the top team in the National League West would make the playoffs with a sub .500 record while a team in the National League East would miss out on the playoffs with a 90+ win season simply because they play in a better division. So this would essentially eliminate the wildcard and all the shenanigans that go along with it. Great.

Ok, where this plan is not so good is in the details. For the plan to executed, one National League team would have to jump to the American League side since there are currently 16 National League teams and only 14 American League teams. This is a relic of the last "realignment" that changed the amount of divisions from 2 to 3 and added the wild card with the Milwaukee Brewers jumping from the American League to the National League for some reason leaving the NL Central with 6 teams (only division with 6 teams) and the AL West with 4 teams (only division with 4 teams). So obviously the solution is to just move the Brewers back to the American League where they belong, right? Well, no. In MLB's infinite wisdom, they have allegedly proposed moving the Astros from the National League to the American League to incite some sort of rivalry between them and the Rangers.

This is dumb for a multitude of reasons. Bear in mind that the following opinions are those of an Astros fan and are thereby biased as such. First off, I believe that the Astros have been selected for realignment simply because they are absolutely miserable right now*. They are dead last in almost every stat in baseball and also have the worst record in all of baseball. So I think the MLB's thinking was along the lines of "who the hell cares what happens to the Astros". Well, for starters, I do. A lot of people do. This is not some pitiful franchise that has never accomplished anything like the, pardon my rudeness, Milwaulkee Brewers. The Brewers' only pennant was in 1982 when they were an American League team. It only makes sense to move a team that has a League Championship back to the league they won that championship in. It would be equally stupid to move the Astros, a team that has a National League Championship, into a league where that would essentially mean nothing. This is really the most no-brainer part of my argument.

My second point of contention is that the American League has the Designated Hitter. The DH is an abomination to baseball. Always has been, always will be. I enjoy watching the National League brand of the sport where all 9 players on the field have to take an at-bat. The strategy and "small-ball", boring as some may say, are really what make the sport great for me. I don't really have much else to add here other than to reiterate how much the DH sucks and is ruining baseball.

Lastly, it has been said that an Astros and Texas Rangers rivalry would be good for the region. I couldn't disagree more. While it is generally good fun when the Astros and Rangers play each other during the regular season, the proposed rivalry could never top the current rivalry the Astros currently have with the St. Louis Cardinals. In the glory days of the Astros in 2003-2005, the Cardinals played a large part in the Astros getting to their first NLCS and finally winning it the next year. Everyone is always going to remember the shot that Albert Pujols hit off of Brad Lidge with 2 outs in the top of the 9th inning of game 5 of the NLCS that would have sent the Astros to their first World Series in team history. All the history is already there. You simply can’t create rivals by switching teams around the league. They are made on the field of play.

Anyway, I guess the point of this post is for me to just vent a little about the current ideas being pondered by Major League Baseball. MLB, if nothing else, is great at coming up with ideas for solving problems that don’t really exist. If you don't believe me, just look at the dumb All-Star game. Their best bet is to just leave well-enough alone and stop tinkering with is otherwise a great sport.

*Don't even get me started on how pathetic the Astros are this season. I don't even want to talk about it.

Going for Gold

This past weekend, I participated in one of the defining moments of my life. I won a gold medal at the 2011 Bar Olympics in the Flip Cup event! Our team, Drinks on the House, simply dominated the event. So now that I am like Tara Lipinski famous I get to enjoy all the perks that come with winning such a prestigious award. No more paying for valet parking, no more convictions in murder cases and no more having to buy my own drinks at bars. Hell, I might even open up my own bar and call it the Gold Club or something where the waitresses will be miniature giraffes who have also won gold medals at some sort of animal Olympics. Also, only fellow Gold Medalists would be allowed in, so suck it Nancy Kerrigan. (Why do I have this much knowledge of early 1990’s era ice skaters?)

There were no silver medalists at these particular Olympics. You either won big or went home. Our team did have a pretty decent advantage over the competition which tended to be a bit older and less experienced in the area of college drinking games. Nevertheless, I will hang my medal proudly on my wall and recount my tale of glory to all who will listen! It was a single-elimination bracket style event with 9 teams. Our team defeated 3 other teams on our way to victory with no opponent progressing past their second player. We literally smoked all of them and they were all left crying in shame.

It wasn’t all fun and games however. Out team participated in several other events and brought much shame to ourselves and our families in nearly all of them. We lost miserably in the darts event due to the repeated failure to close out in a game of 301. The Golden Tee event was just an abysmal failure. Basketball? FAIL. Blackjack started off well and then turned into what Blackjack always inevitably turns into: FAIL. IN 9-Ball, we actually advanced to the second round and then lost in spectacular fashion. At any rate, I don’t care because all I wanted to do was win a medal! Did I mention that it was a Gold Medal? I did? Tyte.

So I guess next year we will have to defend our title. It should be an easy task as we won the thing while having an inebriation level of moderate to high. So as long as Jimmy Carter doesn't cancel next year's games, I figure we are a shoe-in for a repeat.

Drew Brees owes me 825 dollars.

Ok we haven't had a sports blog in a good long while and since this weekend was probably the worst sports weekend ever for me personally, I figured it was time for one.

Let's start with the Texas Rangers. After winning the first two games of the ALDS in Tampa Bay, the Rangers somehow didn't get the memo that you actually have to win the 3rd in order to advance. So now the series is all tied up at 2 games each after Tampa came into Arlington this weekend and quite frankly put a beat down on the Rangers. I still think that they will advance to the ALCS to play the Yankees, but they need to get their shit together ASAP. Luckily, I think they will have Cliff Lee starting for them in game 5 which should give them the advantage. At least the Phillies already clinched since I am quasi rooting for them in the National League.

Moving right along to the Houston Texans. I have neglected to write about them this season because I wasn't really sure how the team was going perform this year and I didn't want to jinx them. After starting out 2-0 by beating the Colts at home and the Redskins on the road in their first ever overtime victory, there was some considerable hype that this might be “the year". I'm talking, of course, about making the playoffs. (Playoffs?). ESPN had the Texans ranked number 3 in their power rankings after week 2. Well I must admit that after watching yesterday's game against the Giants, I would be surprised if they managed to finish 8-8 this season. In fact, that is my most optimistic scenario since the Texans are your classic "Myspace Angle" team at 3-2. In all likelihood, they will finish at 7-9 or 6-10 just like we always expect them to. Until they can figure out how to show up week in and week out, I just don't see the team doing anything of value. Beating the Colts at home in the season opener doesn't mean jack if you aren't able to finish out the rest of the season.

And now for the triple whammy, the New Orleans Saints. I decided to play in a Survivor/Knock-Out style fantasy game this year. The idea is that you pay 15 bucks at the beginning of the season and then pick an NFL team to win each week. No point spread or anything, just win. If your team loses, you are out and if they win you continue on. Last man standing gets all the money. The only catch is that once you pick a team, you can no longer use them the rest of the season. I had planned out a perfect road map for the season and figured that the Super Bowl Champion New Orleans Saints would be able to beat the miserable Arizona Cardinals who were starting an undrafted rookie quarterback. Boy was I wrong. Drew Brees took it upon himself to snatch defeat from the jaws of victory by throwing 2 interceptions in the 4th quarter, both of which led to touchdowns for the Cardinals. It is in that respect that I figure Drew Brees owes me 825 dollars. The game was a lock for crying out loud!

Ah, felt good to get that all out of my system. I thought it was an omen that this Sunday was 10/10/10. I figured that all 3 teams I was rooting for would get "10's" for their performance. So much for superstition. By the way, there is a slight chance that I will be going to the Texans/Chiefs game this Sunday. Should that opportunity present itself, you can bet your ass that I will be wearing a bag over my head. Look for me on tv!

*EDIT*
I forgot that I was supposed to give Christine a shout out. So here it is, go check out her blog here!

Understanding the World Cup

It is no secret that I am not a big soccer fan. In fact, it might be safe to say that I am more disinterested in soccer than anyone else on the planet. I have a lot of reasons for this and I will get into them a little later in this post. Before I do that though, I want to make it perfectly clear that I tried to like it. With the World Cup starting up last week, I decided that I was going to give the sport an honest effort to understand why it is the world’s "Most Popular Sport".

First things first, a little background. I have never been able to participate in or watch soccer in any form. I am also very unaware of the rules and traditions that soccer adheres to save for the kicking the ball into the net without using your hands aspect. So I did a little bit of basic Wikipedia research on the sport before watching the opening game of the World Cup. After getting mildly educated on the sport, I felt good about the rules and the yellow cards and red cards etc. To say the least, I was pumped about the prospect of finally understanding why everyone else in the world found this game so fascinating.

I sat down to watch the first game and I was immediately annoyed. You know how when you watch regular sports and all you can hear is the occasional insight of washed up former player doing the play by play and you don't even notice the crowd at all? Well apparently, in soccer, the tradition of the fans is to be as annoying as possible by playing, and I'm going to use that word lightly, a sort of loud obnoxious horn called a vuvuzela for the whole game. I literally had to turn down the volume on my tv before I blew a hole in the back of my head. And yes, I used the word literally correctly there. Ok so, whatever, no big deal, I eventually understood that this was only a South African tradition and wasn't necessarily inherent to the actual sport itself. See, I was even getting educated about other cultures and stuff by watching.

Ok so once I got over the BZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZing sound, I finally got acclimated to the pace of the game. That was until I witnessed the dreaded "offsides" penalty. Having read about this on Wikipedia, I figured that it must only happen once in a blue moon especially since the article I read praised the rule quite a bit. I found it to be the exact opposite. It is, in fact, the dumbest rule in sports ever. From what I understand, the rule is in place to prevent offensive players from just hanging around the opposing teams goal while waiting for the ball to be passed to him. This would, of course, be a "cheap shot" and I can sort of see the need for the rule to exist.

What I didn't seem to understand, however, was that this rule is applied even in the thick of the action. Take for example the game today between the USA and Slovenia. With 5 minutes left (although if you aren’t a soccer fan you would have no idea how much time is left because the dumb clock counts upward), the USA had a penalty kick which resulted in a GOAAAAAAAALLLLLLLL!!!!!!!! However, the goal was called back because the US player who scored the goal was called offsides. The play in question can be seen here. Now if you get done watching that and say "yup, offsides, clear as day" then I will punch you in the baby maker.

Anyway, offsides as implemented is a dumb rule. But what about the flopping? Is that Manu Ginobli and the rest of the San Antonio spurs out there on the soccer field? Nope, just like in the NBA, soccer players feign injury in attempt to draw a yellow card for the opposing team. I will never understand the logic behind this. If soccer is such a "pure" sport, why does cheating play such a big role in it?

Do you enjoy arbitrary and unilateral officiating? I sure as hell don't, but maybe that's because I live in America where bad decisions can be overturned and rules are clearly laid out. The referee in soccer has sole authority over the game. He can eject players, reverse goals, kill your family in their sleep and decide how much "extra time" will be played at the end of each half. That's right, soccer doesn’t have a "set" amount of time. After the game clock has expired (although, once again, you'd really have no idea it had if you didn't know the rules of soccer), the referee can then add an arbitrary and secret amount of time to each half. I'm told that this is because the clock never stops during play (dumb) and it is to compensate for the time wasting activities that occur during regular play. The referee then at some point just decides that the game is over. I'm guessing that countries that live under dictatorships are the reason for this rule. After all, you know who else liked to unilaterally and arbitrarily decide stuff, don't you? That's right, HITLER.

Ok, only one more bullet point to go. Soccer fans often tell me how exciting the games are and how there is constant action on the field. While the latter may be true, the former is most certainly not. As of this posting, 6 of 12 games have ended in a tie. That's right, a tie, in the biggest tournament in the world. A couple games even ended in a 0-0 tie. How very exciting indeed. The ties wouldn't be so bad for me if I had known what happens in the unlikely event of all teams in a group tying with same amount of goals. Should that happen, the advancing teams will be decided by, wait for it…..a LOTTERY. Are you kidding me!??! Drawing names out of a hat to decide who advances in the biggest tournament in the world!?!? WHAT?!

Ok end rant. 1 billion people in the world are watching the World Cup at any given moment, and that’s gotta stand for something about soccer, right? Right? No. In fact, I am convinced that those folks only think soccer is the greatest game in the world because it is all they have. For instance, I greatly doubt that Slovenia has a riveting college football season where they get to discuss the pros and cons of Slovenia U joining the Big Asia Conference. Anyway, I will most likely continue to watch this world cup. Hopefully after watching a few more games I will be able to understand why this sport is so damn popular.

As a side note, I’d like to point out that this was my 100th post on this blog! Where’s my celebratory cake and ice cream?

Time for some baseball!

So, here we are a little over a week away from Major League Baseball Opening Day 2010. The Astros are finishing up spring training and have played remarkably well in my opinion. Now we all know that spring training games are about as useful in predicting how the actual season will go about as well as blind monkeys throwing darts at dartboards the size of a nickel, but nevertheless, the Astros have looked good. With that in mind, let’s break down this upcoming season and attempt to figure out how everything will pan out this year for the ‘stros.

Before we talk about what the Astros have going into this upcoming season, we have to take a look back at what we lost this past offseason. The most glaring discrepancy in the lineup is the loss of Miguel Tejada. Tejada was a free agent in the offseason and decided to go back to the Orioles organization with whom he had spent the better part of his major league career. Tejada was the Astros best hitter in the 2009 season. His team leading .313 batting average will be a major loss to a team that struggled hard to score runs last season. And while he only had 86 RBI’s last season, keep in mind that people actually have to be on base and generally in scoring position in order to score on a hit.

Another loss, the size of which could be debated longer than I am willing to spend on the topic, is the closer Jose Valverde. Valverde was unable to come even close to his national league leading 44 saves he achieved in 2008. Again though, this is more due to the fact that the Astros were rarely ever in a save situation at the end of ball games. His ERA of 2.33 was certainly not shabby and his arm will almost certainly be missed this year as the Astros did not go out on the open market and pick up another closer.

The refusal to go out on the free agent market and pick up veteran players at the positions of shortstop and closer mean that this will most likely be another down year (or “rebuilding year” for you optimists out there) even in the best scenario. It appears right now as if rookie Tommy Manzella will be the Astros’ opening day shortstop and rookie Brandon Lyon will be tasked with the duties of closer. Both of them seem to be having pretty decent spring trainings. Will they be able to fill the gaps left by two veteran powerhouses? That will have to remain to be seen.

One of the bigger disappointments for me was the realization that Kaz Matsui is still with the team. I suppose my dreams had me believing that his contract with the Astros was up at the end of the 2009 season, but alas, I was wrong. Matsui is one of those professional baseball oddball players that really makes you wonder how they managed to get multi-million dollar deals for being a below average player. Matsui is a perennial inning killer on offense and only slightly better than average at the second base position. Undoubtedly, the Astros will continue to march him out there as a starter and bat him in the 1 or 2 hole which means the chances of scoring first this season will remain low. If popping out to the first baseman in foul territory with runners on second and third with no out was a sport, Matsui would be the MVP.

Ok, with that out of my system, let’s move on to the starting rotation. If I had to sum up the rotation in one word, it would be this: terrifying. Last year, Roy Oswalt had what you might call an off year. Wandy Rodriguez somehow managed to end up becoming the ace of the ballclub. How many of you thought you’d ever hear yourselves thinking that!? These two are quite frankly going to both have career years in order for the Astros to be competitive. That’s because after them, there is really nobody. Brett Myers (old and terrible), Bud Norris (rookie), and Felipe Paulino (utterly terrible) round out the starting rotation. This is one of the weakest pitching staffs that the team has had for years. The Astros used to be a team known for their pitching and now they are going to have trouble having a single 15 game winner.

Carlos Lee, Lance Berkman and Hunter Pence are really going to have to carry the team offensively this season. Michal Bourne having another career year wouldn’t hurt either. I feel slightly more confident with the offense this year even with the loss of Tejada. Hopefully this new coach will place Matsui low in the lineup where he has the least possible opportunity to do damage. Time will have to tell how well Manzella does at the big league level offensively. Having a strong bat at shortstop will be instrumental in getting the Astros back above .500 this season.

Ok, prediction time. The lack of any proven starters behind Wandy and Oswalt is clearly going to be a detriment to the team. The only wild card here will be Bud Norris who showed some real promise late last season. The lack of a veteran on the left side of the infield is still some cause for concern. I would really like the Astros to go out and look for some trading opportunities for a real third base man sometime this season. Quintero and Towles are both miserable offensively. The 7,8,9 hitters of (hopefully) Matsui, Towles/Quintero, and the pitcher will generally be automatic outs every time they come around in the lineup essentially giving the Astros 9 less outs per game.

With all that in mind, all might not be lost. While I don’t think this team has any realistic chance of making the playoffs, .500 or better might not be that far off. I think it will be fair to estimate that the 2010 Astros will finish with around a 75-87 record this year on the upper end of the scale and a 60-102 last place in the division season on the lower side. In all likely hood it will be somewhere in between those 2 outcomes. They are still no where near the level of talent they had back in 2005 when they went to the World Series. Either way, I am still so glad that it is finally baseball season once again!

I’d like to end this post by talking about the Pirates for just a little bit. You see, Pirates fans have watched their team have losing season after losing season for the better part of 20 years. Us Astros fans have nothing on the patience and loyalty of those fans in Pittsburg who have watched and waited so long for their team just to be mediocre and competitive. The current word on the street is that THIS is the year for them. This is the .500 year. So while I will always root for the Astros, I will also be secretly rooting for the Pirates to finally break this beast that has been on their back for so long. Good luck Pirates fans!

Mike for manager

Well it is mid-October and the Major League Baseball playoffs are already in full swing. Congrats to the Yankees, Angels, Phillies and Dodgers for making it to the League Championship Series. Of course, as predicted, the Astros had a decidedly terrible season this year. Falling just short of the 100 games I predicted them to lose, the Astros finished off the season strong by getting swept by the Mets in the final 3 games of the season giving them a 74-88 record on the year.

Once the Astros were mathematically eliminated from playoff contention, they proceeded to fire the manager Cecil Cooper because, as we all know, the manager is responsible for players hitting .200 and the bullpen giving up 5 run leads. Not the Astros ever had a 5 run lead, but that is beyond the point. In my most humble opinion, however, Cecil Cooper was not a very good manager. In no conceivable way should Kazuo Matsui have started as many games as he did. At the very least he should not have stayed in the 2 spot in the lineup as he was an almost guaranteed out every time.

Cooper also failed to get on to players like Carlos Lee when he would lazily waltz down the line when he "knew" he would be thrown out. Coopers starting pitching rotation also made me wonder what he could have possibly been thinking. Granted, the Astros were not very deep at the starting pitching position this year but come on, running Chris Sampson out there for 2 and 1/3 innings and basically starting the game in a 6 run hole is no way to manage a ball club. I would have honestly liked to have seen the Astros bring up more of their minor leaguers earlier in the season when it became apparent that they were in no way going to contend for anything.

So anyway, like I said, the Astros fired Cecil Cooper. Will it have any noticeable effect on the way the team plays? My hunch is that without the right replacement, the answer very well may be no. The team recently published their short list of managerial candidates. All of the usual suspects are there i.e.: other recently fired managers, players who have recently retired, Pete Rose, etc... One peculiarity was the fact that Phil Gardner was on the list. For those forgetful people out there, Phil Gardner was the guy who led the Astros to their first ever playoff series win in 2004 and subsequently led them to their first World Series appearance in 2005. I would like to throw in there at this point that I was actually in attendance for that first World Series game here in Houston. But I digress; the point is that none of these people should be given the role of manager. What then, Mike? Who will lead our beloved Astros to victory?

The answer is simple: me. Yes, me. I know I am blowing your mind right now but the fact is that I, quite frankly, would make a better manager than all of those people. Yes, even if they were combined to form some sort of autonomous super mutant manager. First, I would start with the chainsaw. I would take a similar approach that Ari Gold took when he bought his rivals company. I would literally walk up and down Minute Maid Park with a paintball gun and shoot anyone who would not be associated with the team anymore. This includes the entire bullpen and most of the starting lineup.

When I was done, the only people left on the team would be Michael Bourne, Lance Berkman, and Hunter Pence. I thought about keeping Oswalt but after 2 very sub par years, I think he may be past his prime. But that is it! I would then build an entire team around them from scratch. I figure that by trading the other big name players on our roster that we would be able to get a ass ton of minor leaguers full of promise. Sure, this next year would be what they call a "rebuilding year". Thats not to say that they would be incapable of making the playoffs. I mean, just look at the Rockies this year and the Marlins the past couple year. They've shown some real promise from guys who have only been in the league for a couple months.

There would also be penalties for not hustling. Don't want to run a ground ball out on your way to first? Bam, one game suspension. Let a ball drop in front of you because you dont feel like diving? You guessed it, one game suspension. All I am saying is that I would require my players to play the game like they actually give a damn what the outcome is.

Anyway, if anyone at the Astros' front desk is reading this, please consider me for the managerial position. Im sure you will find that my salary demands are quite reasonable. I would also like one of those large parking spaces with my name on it, none of that "compact cars only" crap. I won't be able to guarantee a return to the playoffs immediately, but I sure as hell will make sure the games are more entertaining to watch than consistent 3-0 losses. Thanks.

NBA finals prediction and more

Right, well we havent had any kind of sports talk in a while so I figured I would take a few minutes of your time to explain what has been on my mind. Enjoy.

Ok, so the NBA finals. Did anyone else even know there was a game on last night? I sure as hell didnt. From what I can remember, the first game was last Thursday night, then mysteriously, there was not a game until Sunday. In fact, the only reason I discovered it was on was by being at a bar that actually had the game on. Now, fair enough, it is no secret that I am no NBA fan, mostly due to the rigging of games, etc. However, did anyone think that there was a chance in hell that Orlando was not going to win the game last night? Of course not, and if you look even closer you will notice that they conveniently covered the spread of four points only by having a foul call in the closing seconds of the game when it was clearly already over. How very convenient indeed.

I know, I know, I am crazy. My prediction is this for the rest of the series:

Game 4: Orlando ties the series up 2-2 in a blowout.

Game 5: Los Angles narrowly avoids losing at home in 4th quarter nail biter.

Game 6: Back in Orlando with the Lakers up 3-2, the Magic win handily.

Game 7: Game 7 in Los Angles, because you cant have a Finals Playoff Extravaganza without it being in Los Angeles. This is the only wild card that is left. I actually have no idea who the NBA wants to win this game. But whoever it is, will. Guaranteed.

Either way, Im glad Hockey and Basketball are finally nearing their conclusion. Unfortunately, as I predicted earlier this year, the Astros stink out loud and pretty much have nothing to look forward to the rest of the year. Luckily, football (both NCAA and NFL) is just around the corner. Could this be the year that the Texans make the playoffs? Possibly. This city would go absolutely nuts if they did.

Only one thing for sure is certain, Houston sports need to step back up to the plate. We had a great run from 1995 until 2005 and from there it all went back to the craptastic 80s and early 90s. Can someone please make me the GM of one of these franchises already so I can get the ball rolling? Id surely appreciate it, thanks.

"Horse racing is animated roulette."
-Roger Kahn

Book it, done

I will be watching Game 5 of the Western Conference Semi-Finals between the Rockets and Lakers tonight after trivia. But before it comes on, let me give you a little "next week on an all new LOST" type of preview of what will surely transpire.

The series is tied 2 games a piece. Since this game will be played in Los Angeles, the Rockets will have a lead at halftime, maybe 10-12 points. The Lakers will struggle in the 3rd quarter but so will the Rockets. The fourth quarter will start with a slim Rockets lead of only 2-6 points. The Rockets will widen that lead to 10 points at the 8 minutes to go mark of the game.

Suddenly, the Rockets will begin to make mental mistakes and commit fouls only when Kobe has the ball. He will sink all his free throws. The refs will rediscover that the traveling rule still exists and call it several times against the Rockets in the closing minutes. Finally, a defensive 3 seconds in the paint technical foul, something they havent called all night, will be called on the Rockets sending Kobe to the line with 30 seconds to go which will leave the Rockets only up by 1.

Ron Artest will go for an offensive rebound but it will be violently stripped by Kobe and a foul will be called on Artest. Kobe goes to the line and sinks both shots to put the Lakers up by one with 10 seconds to go. Kobe punches Ron Artest in the face on the inbound play and makes an easy layup to secure the win. Ron Artest gets a technical for complaining about it to the refs and gets a 10 game suspension. Laker fans spend the next 2 days applauding the refs for their fair and balanced officiating.

Think Im crazy? Just watch the game tonight.

Opening Day

Welcome to Opening Day 2009. The first and last day of the season where all 30 teams are even in the standings, fresh with their 0-0 records. Tomorrow, 15 local newspapers across the country will declare their team "contenders" after their first win while the 15 others will declare the season over and start wondering about what moves need to be made for next season. Unfortunately, I feel the Astros will fall into the latter of those two categories this season.

This preseason was nothing short of a disaster for the stros. They finished with an abysmal 12-16-4 record with the final loss coming to their own AA team. One stretch of the preseason left the Astros winless for more than 2 weeks. Headlines such as Wandy shines in 9-5 loss were common place. It does appear that Roy Oswalt will be the only pitcher worthy of being a starting pitcher. The rest, as one of my friends put it, would have a hard time making the starting roster for a nursing home softball team.

It seems like less and less of a stretch that the Astros will finish in the bottom half of not only their division, but all of baseball. They will have company with the usual bunch of stragglers like the Royals and the Pirates, all of whom have not had a winning season in decades. My prediction of 61-101 does not see as far fetched as it did when I originally (sarcastically) made it in the first place. But hey, that is what happens when you fill out a lineup card with 2 career .200 hitters and 4 pitchers who have either spent most of their career on the DL or failed to win even 10 games this past season.

Hopefully, I am wrong. And if I am I will own up to it. If I am wrong, it will mean that Berkman and Lee and Oswalt had spectacular years, all worthy of MVP and Cy Young considerations. It will also mean that Michael Bourne and Geoff Blum forget that they couldnt hit the broad side of a barn. Matsui and Hampton will have to stay off the DL. Wandy will have learned how to win on the road and the rest of our pitchers will have learned to pitch period.

So I suppose that if all of the above were to transpire then, yes, they might have a shot at making the playoffs. Im not going to hold my breath.

I've come to the conclusion that the two most important things in life are good friends and a good bullpen.
~Bob Lemon