More like chimney sweeps

Aside from me attempting to write my own sitcom, I am not someone you would necessarily categorize as being in the biz. With that in mind, I will attempt to rationalize why the big 4 networks (ABC, CBS, FOX, NBC) constantly shake up their programming lineups by having some weeks with no episodes, some weeks with multiple episodes and some weeks with episodes that are cliff hangers followed by a week with no episode.

After doing a fair amount of research (read: none), I discovered that the majority of schedule based decisions are made based on the sweeps time of the year. You see, if I understand this correctly, during a certain time of the year, generally in May, the Nielsen Ratings group sends out their diaries to their focus groups. The networks understand that their shows had better be not only showing, but be of the highest caliber if they want to take home the coveted ratings crown which has significant meaning (read: none).

The idea is to have the best programming on during the sweeps period which will in turn garner the highest number of viewers which in turn means more hookers and blow for the executives. I am now going to explain the flaw in this logic:

Imagine this scenario: Joe 12pack comes home from a long day schlepping it down in the coal mines. He cracks open a beer and gets ready to watch How I Met Your Mother, which will be on tonight because tonight is Monday and the past 9 Mondays have all had new episodes. Imagine his surprise when instead of How I Met Your Mother, he finds himself watching And now the new hit sitcom guy gets hit with shovel in head for a million bucks! on only on CBS. Joe is now confused. Has his show been cancelled? Moved to a new timeslot? Cancelled?

Joes life is now spiraling toward oblivion. And whats worse is that Carlos Mencia is hosting this new show. Joe now assumes that 7:00 on Monday will now be filled with garbage and switches over to FOX to watch Sarah Conner Chronicles which, much to Future Joes disappointment, has already been cancelled. Summer Glau weeps for Joe. This means that Joe will not even attempt to watch the show during sweeps because he assumes there will never be another episode of it ever. No hookers or blow for executives.

My point is this: Do what 24 and occasionally LOST do. Have an uninterrupted run of episodes at the same time on the same day of the week. Sure, if that means starting the season later to accommodate the almighty sweeps, so be it. Everyone will be happy, especially the hookers and drug dealers. They really need to make me the head of a network already. I have TONS of ideas like this. However, most of them involve Steven Segal...