More like the Lastros

I have been trying not to think about this topic for a good time because I know how much it will depress me. But now since most other sporting events I care about are over, it was inevitible that we would have to start talking about the 2009 MLB season, mainly how god awful terrible the Astros will be this year.

I was taking a look at the 2009 predictions over at the Baseball Prospectus where they currently have the Astros winning 66 games this year, only 2 ahead of the Pittsburg Pirates. That struck me as funny since in previous years when the Astros barely missed the playoffs by a few games people would counter with the "at least we're not as bad as the pirates" argument. And, to some extent, they had a point. While the team did miss the playoffs, they were at least still watchable. I have a feeling it will be nearly impossible to watch an entire Astros game this season without ripping ones eyes out in disgust.

In my opinion, the only bright spots on the team this year will be Roy Oswalt, Carlos Lee and Lance Berkman. I might throw Hunter Pence in that list later depending on how his spring training numbers look. After that, the Astros have no one. Period. Starting catcher J.R. Towles, starting thrid baseman Geoff Blum and starting Center fielder Michael Bourn will combine to hit .300 when you add their batting averages together. Shortstop Miguel Tejada should and probably will be suspended for lying to steroid investigators. Second baseman Matsui will be injured every other weak and hit .250 when he's healthy. And Mike Hampton will be out for the season after throwing a couple warm up tosses before his first start.

I think the 66 wins the Baseball Prospectus is giving the Astros this year is generous. I feel it will be closer to 60 or 62 making it out first 100 loss season this decade. What is even worse is the fact that they have no star players in the pipeline that could be called up to play at the major league level. This season truely is going to be a dud.

But, of course, I hope I am wrong. Hopefully a magic wizard or something comes along and casts a magic rainbow over the team which enables them to actually, you know, play baseball. And if not, at least they will lower ticket and concession prices to reflect the team's poor performance the way they raised them when the team was doing well, right? Right? *sigh*.

With those who don't give a damn about baseball, I can only sympathize. I do not resent them. I am even willing to concede that many of them are physically clean, good to their mothers and in favor of world peace. But while the game is on, I can't think of anything to say to them.
~Art Hill